by Walks with Thunder | Jul 29, 2013 | Uncategorized
Fighting intuition
At some point we all do this, fight our intuition. I didn’t want to see the outcome of Angie’s disease, I shut the possibility that she wouldn’t make it out of my mind. Even though my apprentices told me over and over this will end for her over the summer, in six months she will pass. I couldn’t accept that, so when she passed it hit me harder than had I accepted all the signs and my own intuition. My point, we all at some point ignore our intuition because we don’t like what it is telling us.
Not that I am complaining about that. Many people call me and ask my advice because they don’t want to listen to their own intuition (inner voice). They want to ignore that little voice that says, I know my partner is cheating on me, people at my work are setting me up to fail, this relationship isn’t going to end well. My job of course is to listen to the spirits next to them saying, He’s or she’s a cheater, You need to watch your back at work, there must be 57 ways to leave your lover so think of one cause that is coming soon.
Intuition is sometimes the voices of the spirits who walk with you through life guiding you, giving you inspiration just when you need it. You could almost say inspiration is in spirit guidance just for you. I love my job, helping people to see where they are in life and relationships. Getting them ready for the road ahead.
On some level when people call me it is because they know something is wrong, they just can’t accept it so they want to bounce it off me and see if that inner voice is right. Many times I don’t have to be psychic at all, I just have to be a good listener. I can hear those spirits next to you saying things you don’t want to hear, saying things that hurt but you need to know. I understand that, been there myself not too long ago.
Usually that intuitive voice in our heads is right, not always but most of the time. There have been a few times when I wanted something so much that I mistook that little voice for my own inner thoughts. Good thing I have many gifted friends who tell me what they know about what I want to do before I do it. I don’t have to get a reading as they just go ahead and read me. Very funny, there are times I don’t want to know, being the good friends they are, they tell me anyway.
It is OK to get a second opinion about your inner voice, recommended even. Till we learn to trust that voice of intuition we need to hear what we don’t want to hear. Need to face that situation that brings us sadness. Courage they say is doing something even though you are scared. May we all be blessed with courage when we need it and good friends that tell us what we need to hear. May our intuitive voices be trusted and guide us well.
Walks With Thunder
by Walks with Thunder | Jul 24, 2013 | Uncategorized
On the other side of someday.
On the other side of someday, I will learn to play the piano, and practice swing dancing at night. May even learn to listen to music when I am at home and not just in the car, where it should be. I will write that book that is within me and share what I know with everyone that wants to read it. Empowering each of us to be that person we have always wanted to be. Knowing that our opinions, our choices are the most important ones. Not to give our power away to others.
On the other side of someday, I will look back on my mistakes and say that made me who I am today. Without that experience I would be less than I am. I will fully forgive those who stabbed me in the back and remove the curses I put on them daily…. OK well maybe not that far ;o)
On the other side of someday, my twin flame and I will find new ways to love each other. We will nurture each other to be the best us possible. I will have that love affair with my new wife every night, as she is my mistress and my love. I won’t be looking into women’s eyes, wondering if she is the one. Because I will know her in my life every day.
On that other side of someday, I will walk with all my friends again. We will laugh and talk about the good times we had. Then we will go have some new good times. Debbie Vicari and I will video the intro to my TV show. She will sing Cruzin, and I will drive my convertible on route 66 as our backdrop. Angie and I will go to Orcas Island and camp out for a few days enjoying the food, water and scenery. My ex-wife Debra and I will talk about how proud we are of our son and the awesome man he turned out to be. Though they have passed, I know I will see them once more.
As we should all know someday could be any day, even today. Today on my other side of someday I will make the best of what I have. I will be the best me possible on this day.
by Walks with Thunder | Jul 23, 2013 | Uncategorized
As you know I have been going through the 1st stages of Greif after the passing of Angie. This morning I was awakened by the sound of something moving quickly on my nightstand. It passed over my remotes and lasted only a second or two. I looked over the top of the nightstand and could find nothing out of place. At first I thought it was one of my apprentices doing her homework of moving objects at a distance. So I fired of a text saying, ’you woke me up at 5 AM, well done, keys are not there.’
The exercise as planed is to have the apprentice move my blanket, pillow, keys or even me remotely. I was surprised to receive a text that said, ‘it wasn’t me’. If not an apprentice then who, Angie of course. Letting me know she is around. I am pleased she hasn’t started making the lights flicker and is leaving the computers and TV’s alone. Why would she want to wake me up at 5 AM, hmm because it is funny! Not to me of course but she did have a sense of humor about her.
This whole Grief thing is not new to me, having lost people before this. Even so it does sneak up on me. While shopping at Costco a few days ago. I saw some blueberries and was going to buy them for Angie. Having had the thought, I realized she wasn’t going to want them anymore. It is kind of strange that somewhere in my mind she is alive, and yet she isn’t physically here anymore.
I have a little wooden box with some of her ashes in it. For some reason I couldn’t bring it into my new apartment. I have it in the car. My intent is to take it to Orcas Island, climb to the top of Mt Constitution and drop some of her ashes there. Earlier in the year she had mentioned she wanted to go there. In my small way, she will still get to do that.
While at the movies with my son last week. I was seeing previews of movies Angie had wanted to see. Wanted to see them at home as she was coughing to much to see it at the theater. As I watch those previews and movies, her memories comes to mind. It is a subtle thing, just at the edge of thought, this feeling of loss awaits. The quiet moments in my life when I am not thinking or remembering, just doing, that is when I feel that sudden loss.
May we all find joy, may we all have more than enough love in our lives.
Walks With Thunder.
by Walks with Thunder | Jul 10, 2013 | Uncategorized
After days of stress, packing and unpacking, I find the quiet moments sneak up on me with memories of my best friend Angie. Her mother gave me a redwood stained box about 3 inches by 3 inches, with some of her ashes in it. I put it in the car she gave me. You know that quiet moment when you wake up and become aware? In that moment I feel her watching over me.
Today I was in the kitchen of my new apartment, I picked up a linen cloth to dry my hands. I could clearly hear Angie say, use a paper towel for your face not the linen. Even after she has passed she is telling me what to do! Spirit goes on, she lives in my memories now, and yet she is also alive and talking to me.
As I watched her family take apart her life, her house, her finances, her friends it all came down to money. Her father could only think about the money. Even her mother was caught up in the life insurance, selling the house, cleaning out her assets. Taking some objects of memories, and then closing the door, moving on as quickly as possible. I understand the need to move on, to put your life back together with this big hole in it. I don’t think the holes people leave behind ever fill up again. We just learn to live with that empty place they used to be.
Losing a child has to be the worst thing that could ever happen to a person. My son is a big part of my life and without him I don’t think I would want to go on with this life. May I never have to find out what I would do were that to happen. The heart break of watching it happen to her mother was a very difficult thing. Watching Angie die slowly, in pain, calling out for the release of death. When she passed it was a release from pain, a welcome event.
Though I miss Angie, I find she is in my day. Keeping busy helps me get through these difficult times. Working and helping others with their problems makes me happy. In the quiet moments I can see her smiling at me or grinning at something I did or wanted to do. We carry their memories in our hearts and minds. Learning to live with the hole she left behind. Wish me luck in healing and moving forward. May we all be blessed to know someone who would leave a big hole in our lives.
by Walks with Thunder | Jun 10, 2013 | Uncategorized
Angels and I, Part 2
Angels have been part of my life since I was a baby. My drama queen mom told me that when I was 3 months old I had Pneumonia and died early one morning. It was still dark and she had held my little body and prayed. Asking that my life would be spared. After a few moment she said that an Angel came to her and touched my still body. After that touch color returned to my face and I was breathing normally, totally healed. The angel told her that god had a plan for me and that many people would be saved from the work I would do when I grew up. As such I wasn’t allowed to pass from this world to the next.
Over the years I have thought about this. When I was in college I couldn’t then see anything that I would do could make this “story” of my mom’s true. Remember she is a drama queen and as such her word can’t be trusted. Today I can see that I touch many lives, but not in the epic way I feel my mom was told. My hands channel energy that heals people in 5 minutes or less. Wounds close, pain goes away, and range of motion is restored and so on. Not everyone can be healed in this way. I do like the angel story she related to me. Surely the fact I didn’t turn out to be a priest disappointed her. As a recovering Catholic I see the church in a jaded light, all those priests having homosexual sex with little altar boys, not good. I still give my Cousin Alvin a bad time about that as he was an altar boy when we were kids. I can’t respect an organization that is supposed to keep children safe, but in reality abuses them and protects the abuser. Bad pope, bad! No new red dress or girly man shoes.
I went to my 1st sweat lodge at Pine Ridge Reservation in 1998. Don’t go to anyone’s sweat lodge unless they are Native American and have been trained to do it properly! If not done properly you can die in there as the heat is intense. Accept no wanna be Native Americans in this spiritual practice. I was told when I accepted the invitation to the sweat lodge that my 1st time getting to the sweat lodge would be a test. Of course I was skeptical, how is traveling going to be a test. It really was a test.
It was June, and my son was out of school. As a single parent I needed him to be taken care of while I was gone for a couple weeks. So I asked my oldest sister to watch him for me. She loved the idea as she doesn’t have any children of her own. I was driving from Seattle WA to Santa Rosa CA down Interstate 5. I had planned 3 days for the trip to South Dakota. About 11 PM as my son and I were going up the Ashland mountain pass, I heard a loud popping sound at the back passenger side tire. That tire had blown out on the side. I pulled over into what looked like a large truck park. It had those pinkish mercury vapor lights, and 5 inches of gravel. As soon as I drove onto it my speed reduced quickly.
I had visibility for about 150 yards in front and behind me. To the side about 80 yards or so. There was a mist that I had passed through at the time my tire blew, but here hardly any mist at all. My son and I got out of my little Bronco II and had a look at the damage. A large gash on the outside of the tire explained the problem. All I had to do was change the tire with the spare. My son held the flashlight and I put the X shaped tire on the lug nut to remove it. It wouldn’t budge, it felt like it was welded in place. I carefully put the tire on again, and then stepped onto it. Putting all my weight and hoping a little to break it free. Nothing happened, no movement at all. I was about to tell my son we are so screwed here, when I heard the sound of someone walking in the gravel from behind me. We had only been on the gravel as short time maybe minutes. If there was someone coming I should have seen them giving the visibility. Over the years I have passed this way many times, that area with the 5 inches of gravel and 300 yards of visibility isn’t there. A pocket universe perhaps, but nothing like that exists in that area of Interstate 5.
The man that approached was a tall man, about six foot four inches tall. He had a Peter built ball cap, denim jacket and denim pants, new yellowish work boots on and wire rim gold glasses, and a blonde mustache to match his short hair. He said, ‘I saw your tire blow out and though you might need a hand.’ I said that would be very helpful, as I can’t get this lug nut off, seems like it is welded on. He then said, get the spare tire off while I get this tire off, it won’t take but a minute. So saying he took the tire iron and put it on the tire, hit it with his hand and it began to spin like it was powered. In seconds he had the 1st lug nut off. He said you should get that tire now. I had spent a minute at the back of my Bronco removing the tire cover, and taking the wing nut that held the tire to the back off. I asked where he came from and he said, back there around the bend. You can’t see my truck from here. When he came back to me and handed me the blown tire and grabbed the spare from my hands. By the time I had the blown tire in place he was done putting on the spare. Maybe 3 minutes had passed.
I thanked him and we shook hands. His hand was huge, warm and strong. He told me to buy all new tires tomorrow and to make sure they were top quality ones. I said I would and he walked back the way he had come. I had just put the tire iron and jack in the car and turned to my son and said. Hey we were almost in big trouble there. I couldn’t get those lug nuts off the tire. Did you see how he just hit it with one hand it just spun right off, amazing! I should have bought him dinner or given him some money. I got out of the car and went to look for him. Looking the way he had left there was no one, back towards the bend no one in sight. 150 yards and only a couple minutes had gone by, there was no way he could be out of sight in that time, yet he was. I looked at the ground and my foot prints and my son’s foot prints but no others were to be seen. None approaching and none leaving.
Sometimes Angels are like that, they just do what they need to and are off and gone moments later. I have a friend that had a similar tale to tell. She was also on the Interstate 5 headed south. Somewhere before Eugene Oregon there is a rest stop. Her truck had a leak in one of its hoses. A man similar to my description came over to help her. The difference was he was only five foot eight inches or so. Same outfit and he also disappeared right after helping her with some duct tape and advice.
After dropping my son off at my sisters I took the airport shuttle to Oakland airport. My flight would take me to South Dakota about 200 miles from Pine Ridge. My friend would pick me up and take me the rest of the way. One layover in Denver and my flight would be on its way once more. On the way down our flight was hit by lightning. After landing we had to get off the plane as it had to be inspected before it could fly again. I was told to go to the customer service area where I could get an overnight kit and a hotel room. After 20 minutes I found the customer service desk. I was 2nd in line! The woman in front of me was treating the attendant so badly. She screamed about had stupid the attendant must be, how incompetent the airline was run. She was inconvenienced by the airline and all she wanted was an overnight kit so she could brush her teeth. After 5 minutes she left in an angry rush, no kit. I felt so badly for the attendant, I apologized for all rude clients and said, that woman that just left was probably an abused child. Then I asked for whatever help she could give me as I was stranded without my luggage till the next day when I would hopefully be on my way once more. To my delight the attendants smile came back. She said I can get you a nice hotel with a shuttle that comes by every 15 minutes. Here is $100 in free airport food. Your flight will be out of here tomorrow at 10 AM. Then she reached under the counter and gave me an overnight kit!
The next morning, rested, showered and eager to go I arrived at the airport. I stopped and had a great breakfast. While I was waiting for my flight I saw a mother with a small child asking for something from the food vendors. I heard the mom say that is not in the budget honey. Here I had $85 of airport food I wasn’t going to be able to use. I got up and introduced myself and said the airline has been so good to me that I can’t possibly use all the gifts they gave me. Here use this for whatever you like. They tell me it is just like money here on this level. She smiled at me and thanked me for my kindness. We both went away with smiles on our faces. As I boarded the plane the flight attendant took me aside and said there has been a change in your seating. I was in 1st class for the last 2 hours of my flight! I loved it! If this was a test, I thought I am doing well!
Angels are around us all the time. Sometimes watching over us even though we haven’t a clue who they are. Can you pick out my airport angel? These experiences have changed me. When I meet someone that helps me out these days I watch them till they are out of sight. You just never know who or what your meeting in our world.
May your Angels watch over you, may you be blessed with love in your life. May you know when to complain and when to comfort those you meet.
Walks With Thunder.
by Walks with Thunder | Jun 8, 2013 | Uncategorized
Angels exist in our world. I know there are some who claim Angels are here for you. That would be partially correct. Angels were created by god to serve god. Notice the period at the end of that sentence. When god wants to kill someone he sends an angel. When he needs a message delivered he sends an angel. When god wants someone saved he sends an angel. Do you see a pattern here? I think Angels have more in common with Dirty Harry than most humans do. Every dirty job that comes along, that is for an Angel. The do the task they are asked to do by god. Most times they ignore us.
I have come to know a few Angels and our relationships are kind of one sided. They tell me their message and I tell them what I want to have happen. Since I am not god they mostly don’t listen to what I want. There are there in time of need, protection, healing, lending a helping hand, but only if God wanted it that way. GOD says Watch over this one. Angel does watch over that person and sometimes listens to the crazy thing that person is going to do. Angel lets them come close to a bad outcome and pulls them out of it. I know there are some folks out there telling you to pray or ask the Angels for help. That is a 50 50 result, depends on what they were told to do with you. Is helping you part of that unknowable plan or not.
Arch Angel Michael is one of my favorites. He and I go back a few years. I met him in a dream the 1st time. I had written an article that was published about doing the math and Angels. Roughly like this, 25% of the population is Christian, about 2.8 billion people. Let’s say that at any given time 1% of them are calling out to Arch Angel Michael, 2.8 million in that same moment you’re calling out to him. Now let’s say you’re following the red road and are calling out to your grandfather and grandmother spirits. Way less competition as they are your relations and probably no one in your family but you are calling on them at any given moment. That makes it a much better result calling on the Grandfather and Grandmother spirits as they are less busy and can take your call.
Michael really didn’t like that article. In the dream he said, now you have a voice I am going to tell you how it works with Angels and the math. Every person on the planet has a Guardian Angel assigned at birth. Doesn’t matter what religion, there is a chance at some point they will become Christian no matter how small the chance it is there and so is an angel. Angels come in many different ranks. In no specific order of power, Seraphim, cherubim, Thrones, Dominions, Virtues, Powers, Principalities, Archangels, and Angels. Let us say that you have a desire to have an Angel intercede on your behalf to change what is or could be. If it can be handled at the local Guardian Angel stage it is, if it can’t then it is bumped up till it can be handled. Sometimes all the way up to the Archangels. If it comes that far then an Archangels power is such that they can be in as many places as needed no limitations what so ever. After he told me that information I was dismissed and woke up.
Over the years Michael has shown up in my life giving me a messages. When I see him he is about 18 or 20 feet tall. Has blonde hair that is very wavy and pulled in a ponytail, intense blue eyes. He is so beautiful I though he was a woman the 1st time I saw him. I decided that since he didn’t have boobs and his voice was a man’s that he was a male. Though gender doesn’t come into play much with Angels. In 2008 he put his hand on my shoulder and gave me this message, Choose love now! Perhaps it wasn’t a message so much as an order. That whole free will thing gets in the way sometimes. I was able to choose love for about 4 months and then I just didn’t feel I could anymore. For those four months I had everything I had ever wanted and then I didn’t. By not choosing love all the time I lost a relationship that made me happy, that could have made the future the best place I have ever been. That is regret, and I have no one to blame but myself. Had I followed orders life might have been so much different now.
Having learned the Angelic blessing I give it now and then. If you know what you want and how to ask for it the Angels can be a great source of power. Though sometimes you just have to power through on your own, no help allowed from the Angelic realms. Good thing they are not the only card in my deck as Grandfather and Grandmother Spirits are always there to lend me a hand.
I know I don’t talk about them much but they are real and in our world. Last night I had a dream from Michael, telling me I should send the Angel message forth once more. I was going to have a nap but instead have written some of what I know about Angels for you. Maybe next time I will tell you about how they can be here on earth disguised as regular people making miracles happen in our time of need. Without even asking then, they just help out.
May your life be blessed to know that Angels are real and among us. May whatever god you follow be good to you.
Walks With Thunder.
